Two heads are more annoying than one
by I shall wear midnight
Summary: Two people. Alike in more ways than either of them could know are forced to share brain-space.
1. Chapter 1

Pounding pounding of footsteps. The pounding of someone incessantly banging on my bedroom door. And the worst pounding of all… was the pounding my dear old head was currently enduring. Yup 6:00 in the morning. No actual human interaction. And already my head was pounding from what i was fairly sure was a horrifically painful migraine.

I shifted in my covers. enough to turn over in my bed and look absentmindedly at my alarm clock. And not for the first time that day. I cussed. quite loudly. It was not in fact as i had first believed. 6:00 am. It was 6:45. I had just under 45 minutes or less to be at school. I suppose this was the universes silent retribution for my incredibly unhealthy lifestyle. Of sleeping, going to school, learning absolutely nothing, going home and listening to dubstep, and reading fanfiction until i fell asleep.

I suppose i could have been in better shape if i had ever put forth any real effort in that endeavour. but i had had the problem of being terrified of becoming the kind of muscle brained idiot i hated. I dragged myself from my bed. And just pulled whatever was at the top of my drawer out. "whatever fit." that was my motto. I pulled my coat on. And tiptoed as silently as i was able out the door. i shivered pulling my coat tight around me.

Chi-town was not known for its mild weather. 40 below zero in the frigid winter. 100 degrees plus in the hot and muggy summer. It had snowed a full seven inches last night. and even now small flakes were falling. The glittering white snow covered the city streets and surrounding cars in a blanket of flakes. And the small flakes falling slowly but insistently added a layer of blissful and beautiful silence. It was a rare respite from the loud albeit exciting hustle and bustle of city life.

As much as i hated winter, even i had to admit that this was a simple pleasure that summer and spring could not provide. I made my way down to the bus stop. the head splitting headache making me grimace as i waited for the bus in the cold. by the time the bus got there roughly 4 or 5 minutes later. I was far from gruntled.

The headache was almost too much to bear. And i spent the majority of my bus ride trying not to cry. As soon as the bus slowed down for my stop i rushed through the back doors. hoping that the cold air would offer some sort of respite from the migraine that had declared nuclear war on the inside of my head. But if anything it only served to make it worse.

I had to go through the day like this?! But i had gone through worse. I grimaced as i remembered the time i had been forced to do laps around our schools gym with a sprained ankle. 10 laps in total. which equated to about half a mile. I did them all. by the time i reached the final lap i was in tears. it was easily the most painful experience of my life. this came in a very close second though.

I made it through first period english without much trouble. I still let out incredibly UNmasculine squeaking noises on occasion that i fervently hoped no one else could hear. It seemed to get a little better by lunch time. but by the time P.E came around it was back in full force. Someone on the janitorial team had forgotten to turn on the furnace. So the temperature had dropped to around 65 degrees.

So we were forced to do our normal workouts shivering. And covered in goosebumps and cold sweat. After P.E was chemistry. I hiked my way up 7 flights of stairs. And still somehow managed to be 1 and half minutes late. I walked through the the front door of the chemistry classroom. My teacher looked up from his desk. "this is your third tardy this week. Mr Wallace."

I simply sighed. "Yes mr gomez." I said. "And you are also aware this means you have yet another detention." I sighed again. "Yes mr Gomez." He motioned toward my table. "Please take your seat mr Wallace" I trudged over to my seat. "Yes mr Gomez." I put down my book bag and slumped into my chair. my best friend Michael turned to me. "Dude come on!" he said. oor straight from the 2nd. Its completely stupid!" i continued to grumble. "Whoever makes these schedules must have some kind of a grudge against me. Its the only logical explanation for why I'm always so late to all my classes!"

Michael shrugged. "Or maybe you just need to think ahead more often. And not be so slow in getting to your classes." I continued to glare at him. "Anyway..." He said. "Have you gotten the latest issue of Naruto yet?" I frowned. "No not yet." I said. I hadn't had a chance to swing by the local bookstore and procure myself a copy. I was on pretty good terms with owner of the shop.

So i could sometimes get an issue a few days before it become available to everyone else. "Dude its totally awesome!" He said excitedly. "Madara totally-!" I slapped a hand over his mouth. "Don't spoil it for me!" he shooed my hand away. "Okay jeez!" He chuckled. "Why are you such a spoilsport today?" I shook my head. "Ive had this really bad headache since i woke up today." I said.

"And its only been getting worse." He crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "You've had this headache all day?" I nodded. "Than don't you think you should have seen the nurse by now?" I sighed. And face palmed. Why hadn't i thought of that? "Yeah good thinking." I said. "lll go see her after class."

After the bell rang. I made my way out of the classroom. My mind filled with blissful thoughts of the relief that would soon be headed my way. The pain had gotten slightly more manageable as the day progressed. Though i wasn't sure i could last much longer without finding a private corner to cry in.

I eventually found the nurse's clinic on the second floor after some asking around. The woman at the front desk looked tiredly up at me. "a headache?" she asked. I nodded. "let me get the nurse. ill just be second." she pointed to a line of chairs behind me. "just sit there and she'll get to you when she gets to you. m'kay sweetpea?" I smiled sheepishly. "you got it."

I sat down. set my bookbag beside me, and waited, and waited, and then waited some more. after a few minutes of boring monotony and staring into space. I was brought back into the real world by the sudden noise of footfalls near me. I looked up absentmindedly. To see a young man of athletic build and fair features standing near me.

He walked past me and sat in the seat nearest my own. He stretched out his legs and yawned loudly. It was...odd he hadn't said a single word to me. but something in his disposition. In his barely perceptible little smirk. Unsettled me. I couldn't put a name to the emotion that he invoked in me. but it was far from pleasant.

He turned his head. As if he was only noticing me for the first time. "hello there." he said. "waiting for the nurse?" Oh god even his voice was unpleasant! It was an affected upper class drawl that grated against the ear. I gave a little half smile that that i prayed looked genuine. "Yeah i am." He nodded. "What ever for?" He asked. I grimaced as i answered. "Headache." i said. "And its a doozy too. I haven't been in this much pain in a while."

He smiled and and reclined back further in his chair. "Im sorry to hear that." He said. Smirking all the while. I was beginning to seriously dislike this guy. I very seriously doubted this guy gave a damn about my headache. "So anyway." He said. "what are your tastes in music?" I was startled by the sudden change in subject. Though i still answered his question. Albeit with a guarded air to my tone. "really i'll listen to anything that catches my fancy." I said.

He looked on, his brow furrowing slightly. "Any genre's in particular?" I thought for a short moment. "heavy metal, classic rock, techno, dubstep, and on occasion classical." He rubbed his chin. His smirk growing almost imperceptibly. "Interesting…." he said. "Yes. that will be just… perfect."

Okay, this guy was going from weird to just straight up creepy.

"Derek wallace?" I looked up. "The nurse will see you now." I stood up. Abandoning my creepy waiting room companion. hopefully forever. But as i walked past him i felt a small almost unnoticeable spike of pain in my thigh. I looked down at the creep to see just what the fuck he was playing. But to my surprise he wasn't even looking at me. he had his creepy little nose buried in a creepy little book….The creep. I shook my head. probably just my imagination. i walked into the nurses room. Said nurse was currently rustling through some drawers. "oh hello." She said. "just take a seat on the table there and i'll be with you in a second m'kay?" I nodded. I was beginning to feel a little woozy anyway…. I heard a muffled noise somewhere to my immediate left. It sounded again. Louder this time. "wha-?" I eloquently stated. "i said: why are ya here hon'?" The nurse asked. "headache." I slurred. "hurts like hell." She began to speak again. But this time her voice was completely shut out. I could feel my eyes closing as everything began to feel very…. distant. I felt myself pitch forward. And i was swallowed by blackness


	2. Chapter 2

I awoke to blackness. And I'm not talking about the kind of darkness that you can just I awoke to blackness. And I'm not talking about the kind of darkness that you can just barely see in, I'm talking about the kind of deep, unfathomable darkness that almost seems to weigh on ones eyes. I tried to blink to dispel the effect the effect at least a little, but as soon as I tried I realized something was seriously wrong. I felt nothing. Nothing at all. I had completely and totally lost all sensation and awareness.

I was completely and totally unaware of my surroundings. My senses did not reply to my brains desperate pleas. Willing something, anything, to work. I was terrified beyond belief. And i probably would have cried. If I actually could. Then suddenly a change. It was almost like being squeezed through a tube.

And suddenly. I found myself somewhere rather odd. Darkness above and all around, and on the floor… was this water? Before I could really get a chance to observe my surroundings, there was another sudden change. The liquid, whatever it was, lapped at me. Taking form as it grabbed my body and threw it upward. Returning me to whatever odd senseless state i had been in before.

After what felt like a few minutes. It happened again. With much the same result as before. After a another few minutes it happened once again. It honestly got a little irritating after awhile, but the brief bouts of actual awareness were certainly nice. The pattern repeated itself more times than I could fathom. Again and again, I found myself being ejected by the huge, dark, wet expanse, and again and again, I was back to feeling nothing.

The minutes and hours just seemed to blend together. How long had this pattern been repeating itself? Hours? Days? Weeks? I eventually gave up on it ever actually ending. Or getting any less boring for that matter. Perhaps this was the afterlife? If so. Totally not as advertised. But suddenly. Out of absolutely nowhere. After what felt like the vigintillionth time, something clicked. As I seemed to have found something of a kindred spirit. I can't put it any better than that. And suddenly my mind was being crushed under the weight of memories that couldn't possibly be mine. And as I began to make some sense of them. Everything started to make a terrifying amount of sense.

Jotaro awoke suddenly. His eyes attempting to adjust to the darkness. He did his best to try and keep calm, as his father had taught him. Where was his father anyway? He could remember a stop to rest in the forest. He remembered his fathers tension, his fear. He had been eating a cooked rabbit his father had killed. Then out of nowhere there had been a heart-stopping, terrifying killing intent that seemed to crush the air out of his lungs.

His father had roared at him to run, and then… Nothing... absolutely nothing. His memories of the next few minutes were totally absent, He remembered nothing at all. He looked around his prison. Which was obviously what it was. It was dark and dimly lit. The cold stone walls were covered in a wet, slimy substance. He was too disgusted to identify it. He got up as his eyes began to adjust to the gloom, and he walked tentatively toward the heavy metal cell to his prison. Rapping his knuckle against the the seemingly immovable iron door. He sighed, there was no way he was moving that door.

Unless…

It was a long shot. but it was the best idea he could think of, and that door certainly wasn't moving of its own volition. Jotaro took several steps backward. Until he was backed up against the back wall. His father had only just taught him this technique….

But perhaps if he pumped just a little extra chakra into it? His control wasn't great but his fathers training had borne some fruit. Now it was time to put it to the test. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs to capacity. He called his chakra reserves to action, and began making the necessary hand seals.

snake…ram…monkey...boar...horse...tiger...good!

"Fire style: fireball jutsu!" He yelled.

There was a gout of fire that blossomed out in front of him like a blooming flower, an explosion of pressure and heat. And a cloud of dust was thrown up. Light flooded into the room and jotaro opened his eyes, he grinned. Pumping extra chakra into the fire ball had certainly done in the door. It had also destroyed most of the masonry around said door. Chunks of stone and dust littered the floor. He got up, shaking his head to dispel the ringing in his ears.

He had to move fast, already he could hear the sound of running footsteps. He sprinted out into the corridor. And looked to the left and to the right. There was already somebody charging towards him. "A prisoner is escaping!"

Jotaro squeaked and ran in the opposite direction. Subconsciously channeling chakra into his legs. Perhaps he could find an exit? He ran endlessly through the corridors turning this way and that. Attempting to lose his pursuit. He stopped only when he was sure he was alone again. Once he had caught his breath he looked up and around. Where was he? He had taken so many different turns…

without some sort of map or guide he might be lost down here for good.

"it would seem as if you're lost..." a voice said behind him, not but a foot away from him. He spun around and was greeted by a tall, dark, but certainly not handsome figure. Slit pupils framed by orange irises looked hungrily down at him. Said eyes were set in a pale pallid face, nothing in his tone had been in any way threatening but Jotaro still got the distinct impression that negativity seemed to roll off of him in veritable waves. "Why don't you be a good boy and come with me, hmm?"

Aw hell no.

If Jotaro had thought this guy was creepy before, this certainly clinched it. He turned and ran, every thought and instinct in this body very loudly yelling:

"nope nope nope nope nope nope nope!"

He had barely gotten a few feet before he felt his shoulder being clamped in a grip as hard and implacable as steel. He was turned roughly around. "Aww, and I was so hoping you wouldn't be difficult..."

Jotaro crinkled his nose. This guys breath smelled like dead reptiles. The mans hand was a sudden blur of imperceptible movement, there was a sudden strike. A burst of pain that left starbursts across his vision, and then blackness.

Jotaro once again awoke. He blinked, his eyes adjusting to the gloom. He turned this way and that. Attempting to move, he found himself tightly and securely strapped down, his back flat against a cold metal slab. "hey!"

Jotaro turned his head as much as he could towards the sound of the speaker. from what he could see it was a young brown haired boy about his age. "Whats going on? What is this place?"

Jotaro shook his head. "I'm not sure, I don't know much of anything."

Jotaro looked around. From what he could see he was surrounded by other kids on either side of him. In much the same state as he. Like some sort of human carousel. Suddenly it began to shift, the sound of screeching metal and rotating cogs could be heard. Then it stopped for about a minute. And then began to move again. And after several repetitions of this. A new noise could be heard. Indistinct at first, but getting louder all the time. The sound of screaming. The sounds of people in agony. The brown haired boy turned to him. "Y-you hear that?"

The boy asked, his voice quavering. Jotaro wasn't feeling particularly brave at the moment either. He nodded. "...Yeah."

He said. "What do you think it is?"

the boy grimaced "I don't wanna know."

However, Jotaro's fear only began to mount higher. The terrible noises, the screams and the yells. They only got louder, and louder, and louder. Until the carousel of torture had rotated him and the boy into a different room. And now he could see the creepy man from before. He was standing over a little girl. She wasn't breathing. The man sighed. "She seemed remarkably strong willed. I thought for certain that she would survive."

The man shrugged and signaled to a guard. Who picked up the body and left the room. "No matter."

The man said. "Send in the next one!"

The wheel began to rotate again, and this time…

no. No. !

He began struggling in his restraints screaming and sobbing wildly.

He didnt want to be here.

He didnt want to die.

But he could do nothing, only sob and scream and cry. He was totally at this snakes mercy. The man's eyes widened as he saw jotaro. "Ah its you!" he said. "kukukuku… lets see if you have what it takes to survive hmm?"

Jotaro said nothing, he only lay there silently sobbing. The man pulled up Jotaro's shirt. A brush and inkpot in hand. What was he doing? The man began to draw a design on Jotaro's stomach. He recognized a few kanji. but the rest was indecipherable. Was it a seal? His father had told him a little bit about them. They could be used to transport weapons and supplies over long distances. Buts thats all he really knew. Why was this man drawing one on him? He wasn't a scroll! In any case the man appeared to be finishing it up. "excellent..."

He said. "And now to begin!"

The man brought out… was that as radish? It appeared to have been sealed as well. Though what exactly one would seal in a radish eluded Jotaro. The man placed the radish seal-side down on Jotaro. And then…

Pain. Unbelievable searing blinding pain. Pain that filled his veins with liquid fire and turned his bones to lead. He felt as if his skull was going to split apart. So intense was the pain and the pressure. He was screaming, he knew he was. But the pain drowned everything out. leaving his ears ringing and tears running down his dirty cheeks.

He couldn't do it.

He just couldn't do it.

The pain was just too much Too much for his young body to bear. And so, as was expected from someone as young as he. Jotaro happily, mercifully lost himself to the blackness.

INTERMISSION

before we begin the next part of this chapter. some rules on inner dialogue:

)Jotaro(

(Derek)

Understood? No? Too bad!

Oh my god/kami/jashin. I'm in the narutoverse. There i said it,

fuck.

Oh and i've been sealed bijuu style inside in eight year old.

Double fuck.

Oh and did i mention said Eight year old is Orochimaru's prisoner?

Triple fuck.

Sifting through this kids memories, I could see he had tried to (unsuccessfully) escape. though I suppose I should have at least given the kid an A for effort. And if he hadn't exhausted his chakra reserves with that fireball and all that chakra enhanced running, I'm sure his chances would have been pretty damn good. In any case, if this kid died i would as well. And if this kid was a prisoner of Orochimaru, his chances of surviving were tentative to say the least. If I could, I had to help this kid at least a little. I was not content to become the servant of that pedo-snake in any capacity. Even if i was just pretty much a passenger. well no time like the present…

("hey kid?")

)"whuzzat?"(

("KID!")

)"IM UP! who said that?"(

("Oh good you're awake.")

)"AHH! VOICE IN MY HEAD! IM GOING CRAZY!"(

("trust me kid i can't believe it either…")

I could see that this wasn't going well. I had to keep this kid calm and above all focused. I tried for placating him.

("look kid, im about as scared as you are right now. But right now you have to keep calm and try to stay focused. If you want get out of here, and i know you do. We have to focus. okay?")

I could feel the kids skepticism. Which i suppose was justifiable.

)"how do i know i can trust you?"(

I tried to transmit my emotions to him. Trying to let him now that i was genuine in wanting to help him.

("You don't, But if you die ill probably die with you. And i really don't want that. We need to make a plan. Cause were sure as hell not getting rescued!")

The kid still felt skeptical. But he was becoming more receptive by degrees.

)"Fine. but i still don't trust you know can you tell m-"(

There was a massive rumble that shook the complex, and caused the guard that had been carrying the kid to drop him. Evidently this guy's loyalty to Orochimaru was pretty much nil because he ran in the opposite direction of where the rumbling had come. As soon as the guard had rounded the corner i verbally nudged the kid.

("Hey kid. you can stop playing dead now i don't think he's coming back.")

He got up. And opened his eyes. and i found i could see the world as he saw it, think first person shooter. Only way more real.

)"what was that?"(

He asked. I did the mental equivalant of a shrug.

("hopefully an opportunity. I dont know whats going on but we should probably follow that guard.")

The kid balked.

)"What?! Why?!"(

("because he probably knows the way out and we don't. Just tail him ok? Don't let him know you're there.")

)O-okay..(

The kid began to tail the guard. And i could already see he had gotten some rudimentary lessons in silent movement. His footsteps were careful and deliberate, never placing his foot somewhere where it might make any noise. I was rather impressed.

Not only could i see the world through his eyes, i seemed to share all his other senses as well. And as we followed the guard through the zig-zag of tunnels and corridors. I began to see why i had been sealed inside the boy to begin with.

While his eyes and ears picked up the obvious stuff. I was picking up on everything that he missed. The fine details, i picked up on things that the average human eye might ignore. Things that when put all together formed a very detailed and comprehensive picture that normal sight couldn't provide.

Again another rumble, this one closer than before.

("be on your guard, that sounded close.")

I could feel the kids apprehension. He was scared but he was hiding it exceptionally well. He was a hell of a lot braver than i was at six

)"w-what do you think it was?"(

I did the mental equivalent of a shrug,

("couldn't say. but whoever it is i doubt they're here to sell us cookies.")

The kid felt mildly confused.

)"what is a cookie?"(

I racked my brains . Trying to think up an explanation that would do cookies the proper justice that they deserved.

("well kid cookies are small baked goods made with chocolate chips. and they taste heavenly.")

The kid smiled.

)"oh well that sounds ni-"(

The rumbling came again. Louder than ever before. And this time the wall of the hall literally exploded inward. There was a deafening bang, and the goon we'd been following was crushed under the rubble. The kid was knocked off his feet

Sunlight flooded the tunnel. And a cloaked figure stood haloed in the light. He stepped forward into the light and i could make out his features clearly. Long black cloak decorated with red clouds, long golden locks of golden blonde hair. And a deranged grin.

Oh shit.

It was Deidara.

I was panicking. and i didn't bother hiding it as i yelled at the kid:

("crapcrapcrapcrap!")

The kid was scared and his fear was mounting higher by the second.

)"w-why? w-who is that guy?"(

I grimaced.

("that my young friend is Deidara of the Akatsuk!. And he is really, really dangerous! seriously just stay where you are! Play dead!")

The kid was scared and confused beyond belief. But he complied. Our eyes cracked open a small bit. Deidara hardly spared us a cursory glance and then went charging down the corridor And following close behind…

Itachi. fucking. uchiha.

He continued down the corridor. And without making any sort of detectable noise, sprinted after deidara. Taking up a position behind him theY rounded the corner and disappeared.

("OOOkaaay….") I said.

(I think its safe…get up. And escape through that hole he so courteously blew in the wall.")

The kid got up. And dusted himself off. He slowly and tentatively walked out of the hole. As if expecting to be snatched back into the world of darkness he had so recently occupied.

We seemed to be in a pine forest. And they towered above us. And if it hadn't been for the battle that was going on behind us. It would have had an almost cathedral like silence too it. Without a second thought the kid ran out towards the noise of running water. Leaving behind Orochimaru, and Otogakure.

Hopefully forever.


End file.
